7 March 2008
Yep!
Posted by Roy Bischoff under: Humor .
yep….that’s about right
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, ‘If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?’
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, ‘Sure, Why not?’
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his notebook computer,connects it to his Cingular phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.
Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-Tech Miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, ‘You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.’
‘That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,’ says Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as he stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then Bud says to the young man, ‘Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?’
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, ‘Okay, why not?’
‘You’re a Congressman for the U.S. Government’, says Bud.
‘Wow! That’s correct,’ says the yuppie, ‘but how did you guess that?’
‘No guessing required.’ answered the cowboy. ‘You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don’t know a thing about cows…this is a herd of sheep.
Now give me back my dog.
(thanks to Peter Anderson for sending this along)
16 Comments so far...
Chuck C Says:
7 March 2008 at 10:15 am.
That’s a new twist on ‘counting sheep’!
Matt Says:
7 March 2008 at 10:24 am.
Hah, that’s right. So that’s why our politicians are asleep at the helm. It works.
E.E. Says:
7 March 2008 at 10:38 am.
Does it work if they think they’re counting cows? Dumb question. Anything will put congress to sleep.
CindyL. Says:
7 March 2008 at 12:06 pm.
Cute!
Carrie Says:
7 March 2008 at 1:05 pm.
that is hilarious
tony Says:
7 March 2008 at 1:30 pm.
oh man i love
tony Says:
7 March 2008 at 1:33 pm.
opps there i go again leaving out stuff
i meant to say that this is really funny and i love it.
Stumpy Says:
7 March 2008 at 1:41 pm.
SHOOT! I thought y’all were calling to me.
Pickles Says:
7 March 2008 at 1:47 pm.
No that would be me. Oh man I love…whatcha up to?
Stumpy Says:
7 March 2008 at 1:52 pm.
Dang girl. Guess yer a better sniffer than iffer. Y’all seem to sniff me out wherever I go. I gotta leave ya hanging now though cause I gotta go shoot me some jackrabbits. Cat is starting to gnaw on my knee. See ya sweet pickle.
Carrie Says:
7 March 2008 at 1:58 pm.
You guys are a riot.
Nalvy Says:
7 March 2008 at 5:25 pm.
Get your own private blog somewhere you two!!! hahaha
But that story is so funny and sadly true…. 
LOL
tony Says:
10 March 2008 at 4:05 pm.
i love it.
and iffer is a fine sniffer.
Joy Bischoff Says:
10 March 2008 at 5:06 pm.
Is that girl sniffing around you boy???
HerculesMulligan Says:
11 March 2008 at 8:13 pm.
ROFL!
I shared this with my family, and we were all cracking up! But how true it is…
Cavetrollhead Says:
12 March 2008 at 12:14 am.
Iffer and Stumpy sitting in a tree. s-n-i-f-f-i-n-g!!
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